CANADIAN QUESTIONS ABOUT US, HERE'S MY RESPONSE!

Hey Hoser, Thanks for Nothing Aye.... What's this Aboot?

LINK: http://www.matthewgood.org/mblog/2005/03/hello-america-how-are-you.html

QUESTIONS:

Hello America, How Are You?
Hey America. I know there’s been some friction between you and the rest of the world lately and I think that’s too bad. Given that this is the second anniversary of the invasion of Iraq, I’d like to ask you a few questions if you don’t mind.

1) How come so many of your citizens thought that Saddam Hussein had something to do with 9/11?
2) How come so many of your citizens know so little about other places? I’ve met a lot of Americans and only three of them knew that Ottawa was the capital of Canada, and most of them had college degrees.
3) How come so many of your citizens know nothing about the history of US foreign and covert policy? Why aren’t they taught about American involvement in places like El Salvador, Chile, Colombia, Guatemala, Iraq, Iran, and a very long list of other places around the world?
4) How come most of your citizens supported the invasion of Iraq? Is it because they didn’t have all the facts or because they just wanted to see someone pay for 9/11 and were open to suggestions?
5) After the world found out that there weren’t any weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, and President Bush announced that he was calling off the search for them, why didn’t your citizens demand that President Bush be impeached? After all, they tried to impeach Bill Clinton for lying about getting a blow job – and no one was even killed because of that.
6) How come some Americans think these sorts of questions are bad?
7) How come your citizens don’t care that the CIA and the Department of Defense don’t have to disclose information to them, even though the Constitution says that they do?
8) You make more weapons than anyone else in the world. How come America?
9) How come it’s legal to own an assault rifle but two men or two women can’t get married?
10) Why do you spend more money on defense than education and healthcare? Thanks for your time America.


AND HERE ARE MY ANSWERS MOOSE MOLESTOR....

1. We think Saddam had alot to due with 9/11 or at least encouraged it, for the following reasons. First, an Iraqi intel guy met with Muhammad Atta before he headed to the US.
Two, Saddam supported PLO and Hamas in slaughtering Israelis, paying bonuses to successful suicide bombers' next of kin. Third, Abbu Abbas was found in Iraq and detained by US. Abbas hijacked the Achille Lauro ocean liner in 1985. He shot and killed, US Citizen Leon Klinghoffer. Klinghoffer was a 69 year old wheelchair bound Jew. Iraq gave Abbas refuge. Fourth, Abu Nidal was found dead in Iraq. Saddam shot this mastermind of several hijackings, carbombings, and the Rome and Vienna Airport Massacres in 1985. Sixth, training camps were found. They had bombs and blue prints of US targets. Also, had fuselage of a plain, to train hijackers.....
Do you need more, you stupid hoser?

2. We know plenty about other places you condescending moron, we just see other places as more exciting and less I dunno, stringent than Canada. Hey, who says "Kids forget Disney World, we're heading to Canada! Get your Moose Ears!" Also, with cable and all we know enough, we are just focused with real life issues here and working. Some of us work, unlike many of your free loaders.

3. Oh someone pulled the foreign policy card. We know enough, go to Barnes and Noble or the Internet and you can find it. We focus on our history more than other places. Also, unless we are tied to a country, who cares. Second, what you neglected to say is that in Guatemala- in the 50s and 80s Communists were slaughtering opponents and their government needed aide. Chile had a Marxist whackjob running Chile's economy into the ground, by 1973 Allende was unpopular and had to go. This fool was selling off property to Castro and trying get closer to the USSR. Did you learn that one also? Colombia asked for our help in a drug war and civil war with murdering Marxists. We're still helping, so sod off. Iran, not a shining moment, but at the time Mossadegh was nationalizing our oil and Britain's. Iran was not happy with this socialist, so us, MI6 and the Shah worked a little magic back in 1953. No one complained when gas was cheap, did they? IN SHORT, WHO CARES. We did what we had to do. How come Canada has done jack crap for foreign policy pal?

4. We supported the war in Iraq for many reasons. There were over 14 failed UN Resolutions, Saddam did not cooperate with inspectors. If he had no WMDS why did he act like he had something to hide? Saddam was a mass murderer and killed millions. He attacked other lands and was supporting terrorists. Anyone with half a brain knew he was a threat. I guess you don't have even that much, do you?

5. There was no proof that Bush had intentionally lied about 9/11 or Iraq. Read the Official 9-11 Commission Report. He was absolved in that. Also, articles of impeachment must originate in the US House and go past the Senate.... Clinton was impeached by the House for perjury under oath. Clinton LIED to us about a sick fling with his intern. If he lied about that, he probably swept all kinds of crap under the rug. Also, there is no outcry here, since Bush won both elections, you moron. He's not breaking the law, leave it be, Canuck. Bush is our leader, not yours.....

6. They are bad when they are loaded and made by a condescending little jackass like you? You more or less imply stupidity of the majority of Americans. You allege that we are ignorant or willingly going along with evil. Here's a question for you, moose juicer.... How come Canada has been a hiding place for fugitives from the law, draft dodgers, and traitors? Why won't you hand them over to us? And why are your people so Anti-American, rude, and hypocritical? DON'T LIKE THAT DO YOU?

7. Constitution never says that the CIA or DOD have to make crap. Our officials have to disclose certain things, only if they do not compromise security. We have Executive Acts, and the National Security Act of 1947 is the reason we say nothing. That act is the reason you grubby hosers are speaking English and French AND NOT Russian. We owe you no explanation. MI5 and MI6 have no explaining to do at Old Bailey or on the Floor of the House of Parliament. We could tell you, but then we'd have to kill you.

8. We supply weapons, because no one else makes em like we do. You buy weapons from us two face, so shut up. Actually, we legally sell weapons. Russia, China, your French buddies, and others give and trade in more illegal weapons than all of our combined legal sales and purchases. Who's the real threat? A guy buying a handgun to guard his family OR some Frenchman selling tanks and RPGs to Iran for money, and knows they could be used on his troops or ours? If you say Handgun Harry, you need to get the $hit knocked out of you.

9. Two men and two women cannot get married. Marriage is defined and has always been the union of matrimony between a man and woman. Adam and Eve. Not Adam and Steve or Eve and Genevieve. We have self respect here, and continuity of law. You do not, you pot legalizers! Don't lecture us on morality, ever.

10. THANKS FOR NOTHING A$$HOLE. We spend more money on defense because we have to keep your slacker butts safe, guard our borders, and protect our REAL ALLIES. We spend on defense to even out for those who have no defense. We are the World's Policeman by default, due to your lack of commitment to duty. So, we have to be the best. We've been winning wars since WWI, minus Vietnam, and we're doing fine. How many have you hosers won ON YOUR OWN? Health Care? I've seen your healthcare. Waiting 2 years for heart transplant, and you could die waiting. Free drugs for everyone, but you get less than 1/2 of your pay. All the rest pays for slackers and rip off artists. No thanks, we like our elective coverage. Nowhere in our Constitution are we obligated to take up the slack for some illegal or crook or layabout. We protect and maintain. They can figure out the rest.

Hoserboy, the next time you have a thought, keep it to yourself.